Friday, October 11, 2013

Following the bread crumbs

Strange title I hear you say....yep but let me explain.
Remember Hansel and Gretel and how they left a trail of bread crumbs to find heir way home
BUT when they needed them they were gone...

Sadly my bread crumbs had vanished too
What do we do in that situation??

Start from where we started.
The beginning.
And build up from there, one step at a time.

Over the last 2 weeks I have done exactly that.
I rejoined the 12wbt program to shake up my brain and system.
Week one for me I made it my mission to drink 3L of water a day.
Fuck me do you realise how hard it is to actually think about drinking that every day.
Its mentally exhausting!
What time is it, do I need to drink another glass of water now or do I wait...
How much have I drank so far, how much do I need to drink.
Do i drink now cause I have to go out, will I piss myself if I drink to much and cant get to a loo
I stuck to it and now I don't even think about it.
How and why do you ask.

I got my good old Tupperware jugs out, the green being a 2L and the orange a 1L
I started with putting a few slices of lemon in the orange with mint, boiling the jug and making that my morning 'cuppa'.  I love drinking warm water and my gut handles it really well.
The 2L jug is for through the day and as I leave it on the bench I have my constant reminder to drink without stressing about how many glasses I have had. 
I also have a 1L water bottle that I take to work and drink in the 3 hours there.  That is on top of what I drink at home due to the heat there and the work I do.
Doing this has helped me down my 3L a day with ease.
No more head fuck's or stress.

Week 2 has been about my food.
Watching my goes in my mouth and 
really concentrating about the crap I have been eating
 and how it effect's my mind and body.
Eating bad food makes me sluggish, 
moody and plays havoc with my bowels.
Ive noticed in the last 2 weeks that my bowels 
have been fantastic *knock on wood*
and I have been alot clearer in the head aswell as not bloated to the point where I looked like I was 8 months pregnant again.

Ive swapped over the kids meal, the pizza, for food that feeds my soul with clean healthy foods that nourish my body and mind.  I'm done with eating body clogging crap.  I want colour and taste. I don't need grease and fat dripping down my chin to get a high of my food.

I want my food to tingle in my mouth to the point where it feels like its dancing a party in my mouth.
I want my eyes to love the look of the food, be seduced by its colour, it beauty.

The most satisfying thing I have noticed with take away food,
It has no colour and it smells the same.
Bit like sweaty balls. They all smell the same.

Week Three is remembering where I was almost 2 years ago.
Reminding myself why I changed my life back then.
Its hard when we  get wrapped up in the numbers and in the now.
Go back and reflect on our feelings back then, how we felt with ourselves, how we saw ourselves.
remember the lesson's we've learnt
thank ourselves for what we have done and respect  and recognise the good that has come

I have given myself a huge goal!!!

Its my magic number.
Numbers seem to drive me, sometimes to the point of utter stupidness but they do.
I no longer wear my polar HRM because I let the calorie count fuck me over.
To busy on burning off 2000 cal's a day and hating myself when I didn't have the scales going down.
that shit wont be happening.
This magic number is my goal for Christmas.
I'm not going to pray, beg or wish this number to happen.
No those days are long over.

I'm simply going to go back to the beginning, forget about where I have been
and start a fresh with eyes wide shut to my surrounding's.

Here's to a spring and summer full of adventure
good food, positive minds and no bread crumbs.